


promise I'll be the cure (I'll fix you with my love)

by brightsee



Series: happy endings do exist [3]
Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 15:35:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10811886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brightsee/pseuds/brightsee
Summary: When Betty remembers her past prior to the accident it should be easy for Veronica, no more hiding and they can finally be together. It's a moment of pure happiness and relief, until the other shoe drops and Veronica struggles trying to place how they fit together now as two different people.a follow up to everyone deserves a happy ending





	promise I'll be the cure (I'll fix you with my love)

**Author's Note:**

> i couldn't resist continuing the series. I just love this 'verse so much and have way too many headcanons that I just needed to write. Originally, it was supposed to be pure fluff but yeah, didn't turn out that way. A little bit of angst ahead but everything get's sorted out. you can find me at eternityofklaroline.tumblr.com if you wanna chat. hope y'all enjoy this one!

_Veronica slowly blinks awake, the morning light harsh and sending her pounding headache into overdrive. She squeezes her eyelids closed, hand flying up to her head to sooth the growing headache; her mouth dry, and body aching, Veronica just burrows further into her pillow._

_Something beside her moves and Veronica peaks up at Kevin who’s staring down at her with a mix of emotions. Veronica groans, rolling onto her back and throwing her arm over her eyes. Kevin slips two pills into her open palm and when she sits up and takes the offered Gatorade she feels so much gratitude for Kevin, her lifesaver. Literally._

_“You can’t keep doing this, V.”_

_Veronica eyes the empty bottle of rum on her dresser and feels herself shrink out of shame. “I’m fine,” she mumbles, sliding her feet over the edge of the bed and slumping forward, her back to Kevin. “Why are you even here?”_

_“You called me last night at two in the morning,” he says, a shred of annoyance in his tone. “Just as you have done every night for the past month.”_

_Veronica drops her head, fingers digging into the sheets beneath her hand. “I’m fine.”_

_Kevin is quiet for once, Veronica stands and retreats to the bathroom. She gets cleaned up, removing the dark eye makeup under her eyes and revealing deep purple bags. She doesn’t even bother with covering them because it’s only Kevin and he’s seen her at her worst. Veronica slips into clean pajamas and Betty’s Columbia sweater, the smell of her long gone but it’s one of the last remaining reminder Veronica has._

_When Veronica enters her room, Kevin opens his arms and she practically sprints across the room and onto the bed. He wraps her up his arms and Veronica just relishes in being close to someone, stealing his heat and comfort. They stay like that all day, rarely getting out of bed, and watching reruns of The Office, both their favourite show._

_When the sun goes down and neither has moved an inch, the only light from the television, Veronica opens up to him. “I keep having the same dream of her every single night and I just want one night of peace,” she says into the darkness. “It’s just a few drinks before bed and sometimes it helps. I just want one night without dreaming of her, Kev.”_

_Kevin gives her a light squeeze of reassurance. “I know but you can’t keep doing this, Veronica, it’s not healthy. You know I’m here for you.”_

_“I know,” she whispers, but she doesn’t know how he can help her. Not at night when she’s too scared to sleep or the morning she wakes up haunted from her nightmares, reaching out to an empty bed, sometimes dreaming Betty is right beside her. She tells him what he needs to hear anyway knowing the next night will be the same._

* * *

Veronica wakes up slowly, the soft morning light shining through her room from between the curtains, casting a soft glow across the bedroom. She blinks once, turns her head to the solid weight pressing against the side of her body, to the arm thrown over her stomach, feeling her legs wrapped up in someone elses. She looks down at the mass of blonde hair cascading over her shoulder and onto the pillow below her, thin hairs tickling her nose, a familiar body beside her.

Betty is curled up beside her and Veronica, honest to god, thinks she’s still stuck in a dream. They way the morning light cascades across Betty’s bare back, a shimmering glow, the room lit up softly. Veronica’s sleep hazy mind can’t place the day or year, doesn’t really care to, because in the morning, when she wakes up and Betty is gone she’s going to wish she took more time to appreciate what she has.

So while she has Betty in her arms, Veronica reaches out, gently pushing away a stray piece of hair off her face, fingers running down her neck, over her collarbone, and settles over her heart. She feels Betty breathe, chest rising and falling beneath her hand, and even as she counts her heart beats it doesn’t feel real.

Veronica can remember all the times she has woke up, half asleep and pulls Betty closer to her, breathing in her sweet scent, only to wake up and find she had been dreaming. A year without the love of her life, countless nightmares, Veronica can’t tell what is real and what isn’t. So she takes her time during this dream, studying every little feature of Betty, from her lashes, to her lips, to the hollow of her collarbones.

Betty wakes up, green eyes staring up at Veronica, the corner of her lips twisting up into a smile of content. This is where Veronica wakes up, before she can roll Betty under her and land kisses across her cheek and down her jaw, before she can whisper how much she loves this woman, before she can truly hold her. This weird feeling settles in her stomach and Veronica braces for the jolting sensation of fully waking up.

Only this time it doesn’t happen.

Betty frowns, brows furrowing in concern, “what’s wrong?”

“Usually I wake up by now,” she says softly, searching Bettys’ face, slowly working everything out and it dawns on her. “This isn’t a dream, is it?”

Betty laughs lowly, shaking her head. “No, it’s not a dream.”

Veronica flops back onto the mattress, staring up at the ceiling, and Betty settles herself hovering over her. She closes her eyes, breathing out, her sleep muddled mind clearing. She looks back up at Betty, a warm feeling spreading through her body as realization sets in. “This is real.”

She pulls Betty so she’s lying on top of her and they’re nose to nose, Veronica can’t stop smiling. She’s been waiting months for this, for Betty to regain her memories, or somehow find her way back to Veronica. Of course, when it finally does happen, Veronica is too deranged and deluded to think that it’s real.

But she remembers the night before. Betty getting down on her knees, pulling Veronica in, and whispering so many promises. She remembers after Kevin left how Betty promised someday and then pulled her into the bedroom, hands trailing over skin, Veronica not getting enough. Hours later Betty promising one last time that Veronica will never be alone again.

And she wakes up with Betty beside her and it is all real. Not a dream she’s had countless times before, but honest to god, this is her reality. With Betty beside her and staring down at her with so much hope, love, and devotion that Veronica pulls her down on top of her and kisses her until she can't breathe.

This is real.

Betty pulls back, cheeks flushed and eyes glassy, and tugs Veronica so she's resting her head on Betty's chest. Veronica settles against her, fingers trailing across Betty's ribs and over her hip. She listens to Betty’s heart, a steady beat beneath her ear, and feels her chest rise and fall.

Betty runs her fingers through Veronica's hair, the feeling familiar and foreign at the same time because she can barely remember the last time they were this close.

“I’ve missed this,” Betty sighs, running her hand down Veronica’s side and settling on her hip.

Veronica peeks up at her, a year and a half of anguish and pain pulsing through her, but she let’s out a long breath and settles into Betty. “Yeah, I missed this too.”

They hold each other tightly, neither making a move nor a sound, and just relishing in the quiet morning together. It’s not quite the first time waking up next to one another but it’s the beginning of something new again, a fresh start for the two of them. Veronica places a kiss to Betty’s chest, hand running over her hip.

Betty turns onto her side, a smirk twisting up at the corner of her lips already knowing where this is going. Because after every night together was a morning spent tangled in sheets, hands roaming and kisses dropped over smooth skin. Veronica’s hand travels across Betty’s back, pausing when she feels puckered skin, scars and burns, over Betty’s back, a discovery she had made the night before.

She feels Betty tense beside her, staring at Veronica intensely and she can read every emotion on her face. There’s fear, as if Veronica won’t accept this new part of her. Embarrassment, as if being anything less than perfect isn’t worthy. There’s a deep sadness hidden within and Veronica wants to chase it all away, with her kisses and her touch.

Veronica smooths out her hand, the rough skin from a burn spanning her lower back, hints of shallow scars from glass just above. She found similar scars across her arms, hips and lower stomach the night before, kissing them gently before moving her lips south. Veronica waits for Betty, eventually relaxing beneath her hand that continues to stroke circles across her back.

“I don’t remember the crash,” she finally says, looking at Veronica beneath her lashes, her voice unsteady. “I probably will never remember and I think I’m okay with that. I don’t want to remember crawling out of the car or the explosion afterwards, the scars are enough for me.”

Veronica’s thumb runs over a particular scar, long and puckered and she imagines a long ragged piece of glass cutting through Betty’s skin. It sends a shiver down her spine, the thought of Betty being in any kind of pain, knowing Betty had to endure months of being in a coma, her body healing and putting itself back together, but leaving a mark.

“They’re a reminder that you survived,” Veronica whispers, fingers trailing over the burn mark, wanting to memorize every inch of Betty’s body that has changed, wanting to love these new marks all the same.

Veronica leans up, pressing her lips against a scar on Bettys’ collarbone. She can see the uncertainty on Betty’s face, the way she holds herself still as Veronica explores and memorizes. Betty is opening herself up to Veronica, in every way, and she’s learning where the new Betty meets the old, and it’s not just in the way her skin has changed but in the way she herself has changed.

Betty reaches out now and runs her fingers along the silver chain, down to where the engagement ring rests above her breasts. Veronica watches as she trails her fingers over Veronica’s ribs, exploring much the same way as she had to Betty. Last night had been rushed, emotions overriding all thoughts, and now in the daylight they’re allowed the chance to explore each other, get reacquainted with one anothers’ bodies again.

Veronica sinks onto her back and Betty hovers over her side, eyes hovering over new territory. Fingers explore smooth skin, running over the solid lines and the shading, the hints of reds and yellows etched into her skin. A tattoo along the side of her ribs Veronica had gotten months after Betty’s death, a way of remembering.

“Red and yellow roses,” Betty murmurs, focused intently on the tattoo across the side of her ribs.

“Yellow is for-” she begins to say but Betty interrupts.

“Friendship.” Eyes flicking up to Veronica’s.

She smiles, “and the red stands for love, or rather my love for you.” Veronica looks down and sees Betty's hand, pale white skin over shades of blacks, reds and yellows, a contrast of where old meets new.

Both the scars and tattoos a reminder that no matter how much has changed they are still Betty and Veronica, they are not those people from before the accident but entirely new and shaped from the trauma they endured. However much they want to go back to those two girls, both unaffected and innocent, they can't. They must face who they are now.

Veronica knows that she loves Betty more because of what she endured and still managed to find her way back to them. Veronica would not or rather could not trade her life from before for her life now because despite everything and maybe a little in spite of everything, she's changed and she's still in love with this new, stronger Betty. Veronica’s pretty sure she loves this woman all the more.

Betty pushes a loose strand of hair behind Veronica’s ear, hand coming to rest on the side of Veronica’s neck. “What are you thinking about?”

“You,” she whispers, smiling.

“About me and pancakes?” Betty questions, quirking a brow.

Veronica laughs, rolling onto her back. “Yeah, you and some pancakes.”

“Perfect!” Betty claps, already pushing out of bed and Veronica remains in place, following Betty with her eyes as she pulls clothes from Veronica’s closet.

Veronica doesn’t even care that Betty steals her favourite shirt or pajama shorts because she slipped them on without underwear. On her way out of the bedroom she throws Veronica a change of clothes, waiting for her to slip into them before dragging her out of bed and into the kitchen. 

* * *

_“Get up!”_

_Veronica glares up at Kevin. She was perfectly curled up in bed, covers up to her chin, and so comfortable that there was no way in hell she was getting up. “No.”_

_“Veronica Lodge, I swear to God if you do not get your ass out of bed…”_

_“You’ll what?” She questions, raising a brow and tries to smirk, to sass back, but her lips remain in that ever-present frown, not quite able to show emotion._

_Kevin yanks back on her covers but she’s got a death grip on them and they don’t budge. “Are you serious right now?”_

_“Just leave me alone.” She really doesn’t have the energy for him today, nor any day really, Veronica just wants to be left alone, to wallow and mourn._

_It’s been months since the funeral and Betty was supposed to return to her life but hasn’t found the energy or courage. She feels that if she moves on then it’ll be like she’s forgetting Betty and everything they had, or everything they could have had. Veronica clings desperately to her memories, to anything that reminds her of Betty, and that keeps her from moving on._

_Kevin knows this and that’s why he tries everything to get Veronica out of the apartment, away from all things Betty, and she hates him a little bit for it. No matter how pure his intentions are, Veronica fights him every step of the way because she refuses to simply move on from Betty. If Veronica wants to stay in bed all day, spending her time crying or staring up at the ceiling, or spend her nights getting drunk, she thinks Kevin should let her. There’s no stopping Veronica Lodge._

_There’s also no stopping Kevin Keller._

_Kevin scoops her up, blankets and all, out of bed and strides across her bedroom and into the bathroom. He deposits her lightly into the shower, turning it on and forcing her under the spray. Veronica is speechless, just stares at him through the glass door as he slips out, cold water pelting down on her._

_“Shower. We’re going out.”_

_Veronica glares at him and she feels a hint of anger, she actually feels something instead of the nothingness that has encased her these past few months. It’s a challenge. Kevin holds one hand against the glass door and Veronica is trapped. Her clothes are wet and stick to her, the blankets from her bed are a wet heap at her feet, and she gives in moments later._

_Kevin steps out of the bathroom when Veronica turns on the hot water and begins to strip out of her clothes. It feels nice, the water is a little too hot and makes her skin red, but it feels good to feel something. Maybe depression had been eating at her and Veronica had been too wrapped up to notice or care, but Kevin cared, and maybe that was enough for her at this time._

_He drags her out of the apartment. She hadn’t left the building in weeks; most times her mother brought her groceries or dinner, sometimes Kevin even indulged in her hermit tendencies. Veronica really couldn’t deny that the bite of cool weather, winter around the corner, felt nice. It was like her senses were awakening, the fresh air a welcome change._

_“A pet store, Kevin? Really?” Veronica asks, looking up at him and wondering what the hell was going on in that head of his._

_Kevin doesn’t answer, just grabs her hand and drags her into the store. They go right to the back where the pets are and he stops, waves his hands out to the dogs and cats all in cages along the back wall and says, “pick one.”_

_“Pick one?” She gapes at him. “What the hell?”_

_“I’m getting you a dog. Or a cat. So, pick one.”_

_Veronica turns her gaze onto the animals in front of her and even if she’s never grown up with animals or really had one, the idea of a companion is appealing. She slowly smiles and begins to check out the puppies first. They’re all sizes and energetic little things, Veronica quickly concludes that a puppy is too much work._

_She turns to the cats; a majority are kittens with very few full grown. Kevin follows her quietly as she studies each one. There’s a hairless one which Veronica quickly rules out. There’s a big fluffy grey cat who looks up at her with grumpy yellow eyes, she keeps her eye on him as she moves on to the next cage. There are handfuls of kittens, all playful, but they don’t seem like the right fit._

_She goes back to the grumpy grey cat, Kevin eyeing the thing wearily. “Out of all the kittens you want this one?”_

_A worker pops up out of thin air, “This one is Gary. He’s almost fifteen years old and has been here the longest. He isn’t the friendliest cat, a kitten may be more suited to your needs.”_

_“I want to see him,” she says, pointing right at Gary._

_“He really isn’t the friendliest. He hisses and bites, it’s been really hard to find him a home,” the young girl says, tugging on her uniform._

_“I want to give him a home, are you really going to deny him of that?” She asks, jutting her chin out and looking down her nose at the worker._

_The girl sighs and mutters something under her breath but gets Gary out of his cage anyway. Veronica reaches for the cat and he goes right to her, happily snuggling into her arms. He doesn’t hiss but rather purrs and the vibrating is new and interesting but it settles something deep within Veronica, soothing away any doubts or fears._

_Kevin hums, interested. The girl just stares at Veronica shocked. “He’s never done that with anyone before.”_

_Veronica smiles up at her, “I’d like to adopt him, please.”_

_That day she goes home with a cat and it takes a little while to get used to having him around but it lifts a weight from her shoulders and Veronica feels like she can breathe again. Gary is always following her around, jumping into bed with her, curling up with her on the couch, and Veronica doesn’t feel so alone anymore._

_Veronica realizes within seconds of having a cat in her life that Gary is everything she never knew she needed. She vows to give him all the love he deserves, even when she herself feels lacking of love to give. There’s something about the cat that has Veronica opening herself up more, to her friends and family, giving her the opportunity to finally_ _begin to heal._

* * *

“He’s going to get fat if you keep feeding him things off your plate,” Veronica says, eyeing the small piece of bacon Betty hand feeds Gary. The damn cat is sitting on the chair beside Betty, staring up at her with sad eyes and begging to be fed, claiming that seat as if it’s his right.

Betty looks up a shocked, hand snatched back and resting in her lap. Gary nudges at Betty with his head, paw tapping her elbow, and begging for more. She looks across the table at Veronica, eyes soft and lip pouting.

“How do you say no to this face?” She questions, pointing down at Gary who was still pawing at her.

“Very easily. He’s overweight and has been on a diet since I got him,” Veronica replies.

Betty chews her bottom lip, smirking at Veronica. “Is this how it’s going to be when we have kids?”

Veronica stiffens, she hasn’t thought about kids. She was still trying to recover from the whiplash that was Betty Coopers’ sudden declaration of remembrance and love. With days to recover, Veronica is trying to figure out how they fit together and how to act around Betty. It’s been difficult and confusing for Veronica which only has her drawing away from Betty.

Betty doesn’t sense her discomfort, just strokes Gary’s back and smiles down at him with a goofy smile on her lips. She looks back up at Veronica with shining green eyes. “Are you going to be the hard ass and me the push over? Because honestly, I thought it’d be the other way around.”

Veronica swallows a lump in her throat and shrugs. “Guess we’ll see when it’s time.”

Her cell phone goes off and she knows immediately it’s a call from work. Veronica slips out of her chair, grabbing her coffee in one hand and her cell phone in the other. As she rounds the table, Betty grabs onto her waist, pulling Veronica into her lap and she’s now looking down at Betty hands full and cell phone ringing but Betty ignores all that and easily slides her arms around Veronica.

It’s been a week of this. Betty unable to get enough of Veronica and her shying away because she’s still waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the rug to be pulled out from under her. Maybe it’s a little cynical, but Veronica has been knocked down by life one too many times to be so trusting.

Yet when Betty looks up at her from under her lashes, a delicate smirk curling the edges of her lips up at the corner, Veronica softens. She still tucks a piece of her away, a way to protect herself even if there’s no need to with Betty. She loves this woman, she can admit that, but Veronica can’t give herself over fully, not while struggling with all her insecurities.

“Have a good day at work,” Betty whispers, pulling Veronica into her and kissing her softly.

“You too,” she replies, slipping off Betty’s lap, her phone angry in her palm and it sounds like the volume of the ringer is growing louder.

“I love you, baby,” Betty says, so simply and easy but Veronica doesn’t find herself returning the sentiments, can’t bring herself to say them.

Veronica slips out of the dining room and into the kitchen, placing her mug into the sink and grabs onto the edge of the counter to steady herself. She takes a second to compose herself, taking a deep breath, separating herself what just happened.

“What?!” She snaps, accepting the fourth call.

* * *

_“What?!” She yells, feeling Kevin snatch the blankets off her. Gary goes running from the spot where he was curled up beside her under the covers._

_“It’s time to get back to work,” Kevin says, arms folded across his chest and staring down at Veronica as if she were a child._

_“I don’t want to,” she replies, exactly as if she were a child._

_“It’s time, V.”_

_Veronica rolls onto her back, fingers running through her hair and clenching around strands and tugs lightly. “I’m not going back,” she tries to argue but Kevin doesn’t take no for an answer, not anymore and definitely not with Veronica._

_“You’re burning through your savings and eventually will dip into the trust fund your abuela left you. Come on, V, you really think Bet-”_

_“Don’t you dare say her name!” She snaps, sitting up in bed._

_He raises a brow, challenging. “You really going to let her down? Wallow in bed all day? You’re Veronica Lodge, built for bigger and better things than living in grief for the rest of your life.”_

_“Not without her I’m not.”_

_“It’s time, Veronica. Do it for you, to keep yourself busy, as a step to move on. Do it for her, if anything,” he says, reaching out and squeezing her hand._

_That day changes everything for Veronica. She goes back to work and throws herself into it and all the extra hours and the hard work she puts in, as a way to spend less time at home, and she becomes one of the best in her field. The harder she works the more well known she becomes and opens up more job opportunities, and it pulls her back into the real world._

_Still, when she comes home the grief is still there, exactly where she left it. Gary greets her at the door, and that helps, but there’s still an emptiness that Veronica tries to fill up with work. It only works so long as she pushes everything else to the side, filling herself up with work and success as if that will heal her._

* * *

For the fourth night in a row Veronica crawls into bed at one in the morning, Betty passed out in the bed. Gary stares up at her from his spot at the end of the bed curled up between Betty’s legs. The light from the moon creeping into the bedroom casts a soft glow over Betty’s face and she looks so peaceful, lashes fluttering open and smiles when she sees Veronica settling into bed beside her.

Veronica feels a little guilty. She hasn’t seen Betty much these past few days because she’s been pushing herself harder with these last few shoots and it claims most of her time and energy. Instead of the honeymoon phase, which they should be in as a newly acquainted couple, Veronica has barely spent any time at home. The need to escape, to push herself and succeed in her work has been one of the constants in her life.

Betty gives her a dopey smile, “hey, you.”

“Go back to sleep,” she whispers, settling into her pillow and pulling the blanket up to her chin.

Betty wiggles, slipping her feet out from Gary and inches her way closer to Veronica. She pulls Veronica into her so her head is resting on Betty’s chest, her ear over her heart. Betty runs her hands through Veronica’s hair and she just melts, feeling her body relax.

“Are you okay?” Betty questions quietly, breaking the silence that had fallen over them for a few moments.

“Of course,” she lies, pulling back to lean up and place a kiss to Betty’s neck.

Betty pauses her ministrations and looks down at Veronica. She looks so unsure of herself, eyes worried and her lip caught between teeth. “You haven’t been home very much these past few days.”

Veronica shrugs, “I’ve been working.”

“A little too hard,” Betty says, running a hand down Veronica’s back, her muscles tense beneath her touch.

“It’s my job.”

She feels Betty sigh, letting out a long breath. “Ronnie-”

“I’m sorry, B, It’s really hard but I’m trying here.”

Veronica doesn’t elaborate on what’s hard because honestly, everything in her life is hard. Work is her only salvation, her only escape from home and Betty where everything still feels unsettled and in the air. Maybe for Betty it’s easy, regaining her memories and knowing where she belongs but for Veronica it’s harder to figure it all out.

Veronica didn’t just lose her memories, she still remembers everything from before and after the accident, and it haunts her. The way she had closed herself off from everyone and everything, she’s finding habits harder to break than expected. This relationship with Betty is supposed to be easy but she hides her feelings, pushing everything away, and holds Betty at bay.

Her perfect escape is work and her relationship is suffering because of it. Veronica still has her fears and insecurities, everything she’s still trying to work through but pushes it down where she doesn’t have to deal with it. She does what she knows best, pushing everything down until it can’t be ignored any longer.

Before Veronica falls asleep that night, she feels Betty place a kiss to the top of her head. “How do I help you, Veronica, when you don’t let me in?” Betty whispers into the air and Veronica doesn’t have an answer for her and leaves Betty hanging, falling asleep moments later.

Veronica wakes up the next morning sweating. She’s curled up on the edge of the bed, Betty sprawled out in the middle hand reaching out for a feel of Veronica with her fingers barely grazing her back. Veronica slips out of bed, careful not to disturb Betty, and gets ready for the day. The water in her shower is too cool, her body feeling on fire and the phantom feeling of fire still haunts her.

When Veronica is showered, dressed, and make up applied, Betty is still asleep in bed. She takes a second, hovering in the doorway of the en suite just to study Betty, watching as her chest rises steadily with each breath. Her lips are open a fraction and she looks so peaceful and calm, eerily similar to the nightmare she woke up from.

It’s the one where Veronica is paralyzed on the sidelines, watching as Betty’s car crashes and is knocked unconscious. Veronica wants to go to her, to grab her, and pull her from the car but she’s rooted and place and forced to watch the whole car go up in flames. In a different variation of the same nightmare, sometimes Betty will wake up just before the explosion and call out to Veronica, the sounds of her cries staying with her well after she wakes up.  
Betty stirs from where she’s curled up in their bed, nose crinkling, and eyes blinking open. She smiles when she catches Veronica staring at her from across the room and pats the empty space of the bed beside her. Veronica shakes her head, an excuse, because she can’t bring herself to touch Betty, not when the nightmare is fresh in her mind.

“I have to get to work,” she says, offering Betty an apologetic look.

Betty frowns, settling back into her pillows but eyeing Veronica warily. “Have a good day, Babe.”

“You too, I’ll see you tonight.” And with that Veronica cross the room, no goodbye kiss, and heads to work. The guilt weighs heavy on her chest but this is the only way Veronica knows how to survive and cope, on her own. 

* * *

_Veronica doesn’t want to think about what day it is; hell, she doesn’t even want to think, so she finds the closest pub and heads inside. She’s the first one in there since the placed opened up roughly around lunch time. Veronica doesn’t really know what time it is, just that the sun shines in through stained glass windows and a few regulars have slowly walked in since she entered._

_At some point between her third and fifth double rum and coke Kevin walks in, letting out a huff as he sits down beside her. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”_

_“Congratu-fucking-lations you found me,” she deadpans, finishing off her drink._

_Kevin slaps her hand when she tries to signal for another drink. “How long have you been here?”_

_Veronica holds up her empty glass, looking at the ice and the little cocktail straw. “I don’t know, I lost count on how many drinks I’ve had. Not enough, clearly.”_

_“Can I get two waters, please?” He asks the bartender and suddenly there’s a glass of water being shoved under her nose. “Drink it.”_

_“Thanks, dad, but I’m not thirsty.”_

_“Can you for once act like a fucking human being?” Kevin curses._

_She looks up at him, his face red and angrier than she has ever seen him. “What’s up with you?”_

_He growls, standing off his stool and challenging her. “You think you’re the only one hurting? You think you’re the only one that loved Betty? God, Veronica, I’ve been picking you up off the bathroom floor for months trying to put you back together, as if I’m not dealing with my own loss. Betty was my best friend.”_

_Veronica stands, wobbles a little as she slides onto her feet and has to hold onto the bartop with one hand. “And she was my fiance!”_

_Kevin runs a hand over the top of his head, looking anywhere but at Veronica. “I’m so fucking tired of this shit.”_

_She watches him throw money onto the bar and leaves without saying another word to her. Veronica runs after him, grabbing at his wrist and stopping him on the sidewalk. “What’s that supposed to mean?”_

_He looks at her, incredulous. “You’re a mess, Veronica, and you’re so fucking selfish, you know that?”_

_“Well, I’m sorry, but-”_

_“No, you listen to me,” he says, interrupting her. “You lost your fiance but I lost both my best friends. It hurt so much to lose Betty but I moved on, and now I’m forced to watch you destroy yourself. It’s been almost a year, Veronica, and you’re a ghost, still stuck in your own grief. The world continues to spin without Betty Cooper and without you. I’m tired of watching you destroy yourself.”_

_His anger recedes, Kevin just shakes his head. “I’m trying to help you but you won’t let me.”_

_Veronica feels the first tear fall and it’s followed by a flood. She collapses into his arms and they stand like that on the street, people bumping into them but neither saying a word. Veronica knows she’s been selfish and absorbed in her grief for far too long._

_“You should talk to someone,” he says, pulling back._

_She wipes away her tears and nods, he’s probably right. “I’m sorry.”_

_“I know it’s Veronica Lodge fashion but you need to stop shutting people out, let us in, V.”_

* * *

Veronica comes home one night late without calling Betty before hand. She really doesn’t think it’s a big deal, doesn’t really think that Betty would be waiting for her or wondering where she is. Veronica has spent so much of the prior year without answering to anyone, without a significant other, and sometimes she forgets she has someone waiting for her at home.

Sometimes having Betty back is a blessing, Veronica loves her with everything she has, but other times it’s a challenge. She’s gone over a year without Betty by her side, she’s adapted and grown, now she’s being forced to adapt again. Veronica struggles with figuring out how they fit together again, how she can open herself up again after being closed off for so long.

And maybe she lashes out at Betty, a small part of her wanting to hurt her in the same way she has been hurting. It’s petty, Veronica knows this, but she can’t stop herself from lashing out.

When she comes home, close to midnight because a few work friends wanted to go out for drinks after, she’s a little tipsy. Veronica enters the apartment with all of the lights still on but she shrugs it off and dumps her heels and purse by the door. As she rounds the corner of the kitchen she notices the table set up, fine china and unlit candles.

Betty stands from the couch when she hears Veronica walk in, her arms crossed and a frown on her lips. There’s a crease between her brows and her lips are pursed, she is pissed. And Veronica finally realizes what she’s done, how she’s come home late and most likely smelling of alcohol, missing dinner and worrying Betty.

“Shit, Betts, I forgot,” she finally says, entering the living room and collapsing onto the couch.

Betty stares down at her, “You forgot?”

Betty had been talking about a nice home cooked dinner for weeks and Veronica had promised she’d be home early for it. She just happened to forget that tonight was the night of their dinner, instead pushing her working hours later and going out with friends after. She knows it meant a lot to Betty that she showed up and maybe this was her acting out, a sense of punishment that was unfair and unjust towards Betty.

Veronica shrugs, there’s no way to explain herself. “I’m sorry.”

“What’s wrong with you?” Betty asks, anger growing and her fist curling up at her sides. An old habit and Veronica wants to reach out, to unfurl her fist and lace their fingers together and just hold her.

She doesn’t, no matter how much she wants to.

Weeks of this and Betty’s only just about to crack. Veronica has been distant, pulled herself away, has barely been around, all for what? Anger? Revenge? Fear was more like it. She closes her eyes and her head falls back against the couch, there’s too many things wrong with her, thoughts rolling around in her head and she can’t express them.

Veronica settles for what she knows best. “Nothing is wrong, Betty.”

A lie.

Everything inside her screams. Especially when she opens her eyes and see Betty stare down at her hurt across her features, a hint of anger behind her eyes, as if she wants to reach out and just shake Veronica. She wants to bring out that anger, she wants a fight. Because how can Betty act like everything's normal? Weeks spent together from her declaration of love. Doesn’t she know that you can’t go from nothing but mere friends to lovers?

“You’re forgetting that I know when you’re lying, Veronica,” she growls. “I know you.”

“You don’t know me though.”

Betty shrinks, shaking her head. “I thought I did. I knew the old you and I fell in love with the new you, the one weathered by loss. I know you, Veronica, I just don’t know why you’re doing this.”

Veronica steadies her gaze, raising a brow and going toe to toe with Betty. “What am I doing?”

“You’re shutting me out!” She yells, getting angry now. “I remember everything and I thought we could be together, pick up where we left off!”

Veronica stands now, only a coffee table separating the two. “That’s where you’re wrong, thinking we could just go back to the way we were. Back before the accident? We were two different people back then. Things have changed, we’ve both changed.”

There’s a flicker of hurt and confusion across Betty’s face. “But that first night together?”

“Because I love you, Betty, I do-”

“Then fucking act like it,” she curses.

“I can’t!” Veronica falls back onto the couch, rubbing at her eyes feeling tears begin to form. “That whole year without you I was a wreck,” she finally says, softer this time. “Kevin has picked me up off the floor more times then I can count and helped me pieced my life back together. And then I found you again and everything got fucked up again.”

Betty wants to interject, to say something, but Veronica holds her hand up and continues.

“I’ve pushed everything deep down because these past seven months have been about you healing and gaining your memories back. I don’t how to act around you, okay?” She takes a shaky breath, wiping away a tear from the corner of her eye.

Betty comes to sit down beside her, taking her hand in both of hers. Veronica continues, “We’re different now and we can’t just pick up where we left off no matter how hard we try. And it feels like that’s what you’ve done. You suddenly remember and you got down on your knees and declared your love, but Betty, I wasn’t there yet. I love you so much but I never got to process my feeling or emotions about all this.”

“I dragged you into a relationship,” Betty says, dropping her head.

“Not one that I didn’t want to be in. But yeah, and I resented you for that.”

“I’m sorry, V.”

Veronica shakes her head, squeezing Betty’s hands in hers. “It’s all my fault. If I had given myself the time to go through my emotions, or just talk to you, we could have resolved this weeks ago. Instead I’ve just been pushing you away. I’m scared, B.”

“Of what?”

“Of everything. Of being in love with you. Losing you again. Finding out that we just don’t fit together anymore,” she lists off.

Betty lets go of Veronicas hands and holds open her arms. “Come here.”

Veronica slides across the couch and leans against her, head resting against her shoulder, and Betty holds onto her tightly. “We’re V and B, we’re always going to fit together, okay? No more thinking like that. And you’re not going to lose me, in any way, not if I can help it.”

“But you can’t,” Veronica argues weakly, looking up at Betty beside her.

Her lips twitch up in a small smile, a little sad. “No, you can’t, but you can have hope that things will work out. And trust. Do you trust me, Veronica?”

“Of course, I do.”

Betty kisses the top of her head, “then trust me now. Open up to me,V, because it’s lonely out here.”

“I’ll try.”

“That’s all I ask,” Betty says.

Veronica relaxes into her arms and gives in to Betty, doesn’t hold back anymore. “Maybe we can go to bed and talk some more?”

Betty pulls back and smiles, “I’d love that.”

She stands and pulls Betty towards the bedroom, curled up on the bed, and they talk until the early hours of the morning until, only falling asleep in each other’s arms when the sun begins to rise. Gary is right between them, settling at their hips over the covers, and Veronica falls asleep with one hand in Gary’s soft fur and the other laced with Betty’s fingers.

* * *

_“You’re looking better,” Kevin says, walking out onto the balcony._

_Veronica has her head tilted back, feeling the hot sun on her neck and face. She takes a deep breath, breathing in the fresh spring air. It smells like new beginnings, fresh grass, and trees budding. She smiles up at Kevin, “I feel better.”_

_“That therapist must really be helping.” He sits down in the chair beside her, stretching out his legs._

_“She is. I feel healthier, so much better being able to talk about these things than hold them in,” she tells him, feeling the truth of her words._

_“I’m proud of you, V,” he says and she sends him a wink. “I got you something.”_

_Kevin hands her an envelope and she pulls out two plane tickets destined for Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. “Kevin,” she scolds. “Tickets to Brazil?”_

_“Think of it as part vacation and part closure. You need this.”_

_She stares down at the tickets, folding them over in her hands. Can she really go there? To the place where Betty died? But it also holds family history, her fathers’ home and a place she’s always wanted to visit. Can she do this? Would she survive the trip? She weighs the pros and cons all for a few seconds before coming to a decision._

_“I could really use a vacation,” she settles on, smiling at Kevin. She needs to do this. “Thank you.”_

_“Anything for you, babe.”_

* * *

Veronica looks at Betty, curled up but right up against her side. There’s no ounce of guilt or anger towards her girl, only love. A week after resolving things, they’ve finally hit their stride and are starting to grow together and not apart. More than forgiving Betty, she’s forgiven herself.

It feels good to hold Betty, knowing it’s not a dream but reality. She wakes up happy and content, Betty right beside her and placing a kiss on her lips. There’s no longer the hesitation between them or Veronica keeping her at arm's length, not anymore.

It’s nice, Veronica finds out pretty quickly, to have Betty back. They’re not the same people they were and neither are trying to fit back into the relationship they held before the accident, instead creating something new. Betty had said it best many days ago, when they were curled up in bed, saying quietly into the dark of the bedroom before they fell asleep, calling this a “new beginning.”

And it is. Both finding peace. Picking up where they left off before the accident, before Betty proclaimed her love, and before their blow up, and creating something more together. Because what they have now is better than what they had before, deeply rooted in understanding, trust, and love.

Betty is passed out in her arms and Veronica watches her sleep. There’s no fear of nightmares, not anymore, no fear of waking up and thinking it’s all a dream. She just wants to hold Betty, love Betty, and never let go. She’s finally hit the honeymoon stage of their relationship, everything new again.

A loud howl erupts through the apartment and Betty stirs, nose scrunching up and blinking awake and looking up to Veronica. “It’s your cat again,” she says, pouting.

“I told you he was like this,” Veronica says, unable to hide her amusement. She laughs when Gary howls again, Betty rolling away from Veronica and shoving a pillow over her head. “I told you he was getting senile, babe.”

Betty shoves at her, “go get him.”

“So, this is how it’s going to be, huh?” She teases, pulling the pillow from Betty’s face. “When we have kids, I’m going to be the one getting up in the middle of the night?”

“You’re insufferable,” Betty moans, peaking up at her. “Of course, it’s not.”

“Uh huh,” Veronica winks at her, slipping out of bed to grab the cat who was probably howling in the kitchen.

When Veronica returns, Betty has propped herself up on an elbow and watching as Veronica climbs back into bed. Gary takes his spot between them, curling up and falling asleep satisfied. Veronica sinks into her pillow, turning on her side to look at Betty, unable to contain her smile.

She’s happy, so goddamn happy and in love. And she’s finally letting herself feel that love this time, despite the fear. Betty reaches out, tucking a fallen strand of hair behind Veronicas’ ear. “What’s got you so smiley?”

Veronica looks at Betty and sees her future laid out so clearly for her. It’s years spent together, never letting either one go, learning and growing together. It’s a future filled with Betty, their family, and possibly children one day. The idea makes her unbelievably happy.

“You,” she answers simply. “The idea of you and kids someday.”

Betty smiles, “you’ll make a great mother, Veronica.”

“So will you.” She pulls Betty down beside her so they’re nose to nose, and she reaches out and gives her a soft kiss. “I know I haven’t said this much but I love you so much, Betty Cooper.”

“I love you too.”

“And I’m glad we’re finally on the same page,” Veronica adds. “B and V back together again.”

“Forever this time,” Betty says with a hint of finality, sealing the deal with a kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> soooo what'd you think?


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